The Mirror of Invisibility
- Susan Hoyle INHC
- 2 days ago
- 2 min read
The Mirror of Invisibility
Have you ever felt invisible in a relationship? Like no matter what you did, the other person just couldn’t see you?
For a long time, I thought being unseen was about them—that they weren’t giving me the attention, acknowledgment, or recognition I deserved. But through my journey, doing “the work”, I had a revelation:
Invisibility isn’t rejection—it’s reflection.
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Everyone is a Mirror
The truth is, every relationship reflects something back to us. When someone can’t truly see you, it’s often because they can’t see themselves. Their blindness isn’t about your worth—it’s about their own invisibility being mirrored outward.
But here’s the part that stings a little: when we don’t fully see ourselves, we feel invisible more easily. It’s almost like the mirror gets doubled—our unseen places resonate with theirs, and suddenly we’re both standing in a reflection of invisibility.
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The Trigger as a Teacher
Those moments when we feel unseen are painful, but they are also teachers. They invite us to ask:
• Where am I not fully acknowledging myself?
• What parts of me am I hoping someone else will validate instead of validating within?
Instead of blaming the mirror, we can use it as an invitation to go deeper into self-love.
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Choosing to See Yourself
The moment we begin to truly see and love ourselves, the cycle breaks. We stop depending on another person’s ability to see us. Their blindness no longer defines us.
In that space, invisibility dissolves—not because the other person changed, but because we chose to.
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Closing Thought
Here’s the truth that emerged for me:
“Invisibility isn’t about you—it’s the reflection of what hasn’t yet been seen within. When you choose to see and love yourself, you stop being unseen.” —Susan Hoyle
So the next time you feel invisible, pause. Instead of asking, “Why don’t they see me?”try asking, “Where am I not seeing myself?” You may find that invisibility was never rejection—it was always a mirror.
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